Say, Buddy. Got time to explain something to me?

Can you explain something to me? I heard Paul Ryan at his press conference describe how the new tax code will help America “recover.” And to give an example of how cutting the corporate tax to 20% will bring American businesses back, he used an example from his own state – Wisconsin. He said the biggest company headquartered in Wisconsin used to be Johnson Controls (or something like that), but they’re not there anymore. Instead, they’ve moved their business to Ireland where the tax is something like 12.5%. But when America cuts its tax rate to 20%, the company will come back and build new buildings and hire new workers.

 Now I know my mind’s been clouded by all those years of teaching and defending the teaching of critical thinking. But I don’t even need to use critical thinking to figure out that 12.5% is significantly less than 20%. So are the operators and stock holders of Johnson Controls, who moved the company from America because they wanted to go where the tax was lower, just not smart? If that’s not the case, why will they be bringing the company back to America?

 Maybe it’s just something about trickle down that I don’t understand.

 

From the Archives: Series 1 — The Anti-Meeting Movement

First Settlement marker at Bedford NH

First Settlement marker at Bedford NH (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I can’t take sole credit for all the items published under the label of “From the Archives.” Some, like the Anti Meeting Movement, are the result of a collaborative effort of academics who wanted to think themselves beautiful people living in a world that could have only been created by J. D. Salinger.

Not Minutes

Nor Hours

Nor Seconds

Nor Even Days

Enter the Catalogue

“The effect of the three-part series is normality and reasonableness, and it is related distantly to the syllogism. But when the writer creates the third kind of series, of four-or-more parts, he achieves another effect: that of plethora, abundance, the unlimited, or what Professor Corbett calls the ‘weighty and exhausting.’ At times the effect is extended to that of the diversity that is confusion. With the longer series the writer moves from the certainty of the two-part, from the reasonableness of the three-part, to the more complicated emotional realism of the catalogue.” (Weathers, 97)

732101
s, m, xl, fat
bl, br, chartreuse
$37.00 ($2.50 members)

Since the first order of business we did not conduct at the first tri-annual, bi-weekly departmental anti-meeting was to not appoint someone to take minutes, those of you not present at last Friday’s session will never know what happened there unless you ask someone who wasn’t there, but then that wouldn’t help. Just be advised and otherwise informed that this is not an apathetic society of sorts but a genuine movement toward anti-movement–unless trust is mis placed, in which case, those in formal dress will be considered to be in an anti-trust suit. (We can tell you, though, that attendance was good among those who went and not so good among those who didn’t.) (Please specify color and size and include your membership number on all checks.)

3.14159265+
(available in either Beta or VHS)

A Cat and Its Tale   Since some members of the department left other members of the department holding the bill last Friday, there will be more departmental undergraduate-level ego stroking at a departmental anti-meeting, but not this Friday, owing to the disloyalty of some members of the department anti-organizing committee who think social engagements are more important than anti-social meetings and some members who won’t be sane enough to start the whole process over again this Friday. Therefore, the next anti-meeting will be held a week from this Friday (That’s February 22) (note the vag ref of “that’s) (SEE HNDBK, P. 24). There will also be a change in venue. (Idiom). The trial (see, I knew what it meant) will be held at the Sheraton Wayferer (sp?) in Bedford, NH, starting at 3:30 in the afternoon. (Mature audiences only. Must be 21 to order.)

NOT SUBMITTED DISRESPECTFULLY BY
SOME MORE MEMBERS OF THE ENGLISH DEPARTMENT

PLEASE NOTE THE ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY CREATED BY THE TWO PART SERIES.

Say What?

Found this amazing sentence in an email I received this afternoon:

The Ohio State Alumni Club of Atlanta invites you to see the home of our new football game watch parties at a preseason kickoff party. Renew your club membership for the 2012-13 year and enjoy free food and beverages at a reduced price.

That’s great news. I didn’t know how much longer I was going to be able to afford free food and beverages.